I’m someone who’s never wanted kids. I never had the desire. I don’t feel that sense of want/need when it comes to children. I don’t want to carry a child, birth a child, or raise a child. Nothing about any of that appeals to me. I love being the Fun Aunt who spoils her nephews and then drops them back off at home full of sugar with more toys they don’t really need. I’ve been on various forms of birth control for a number of years now. First I was using Depo because I wanted something long term-ish, and something I didn’t need to worry about taking every day. After that, I switched to Nexplanon, the arm implant. I really want something longer term and that I could put out of my mind for a few years. The idea of an IUD didn’t really appeal to me and honestly freaked out a bit. I’ve had the implant now for about 4 years and haven’t had that many issues with it. I’d renew it again if I wasn’t going to a more permanent route.
I’ve thought about having my tubes tied for a few years now. It just wasn’t something that was needed right away or that I was too concerned about. Not to mention it can be harder for women who don’t have children to get the procedure done. Hell, based on stories I’ve read it can even be hard for those who have their families and are ready to call it quits in the kid department. I wasn’t sure I really wanted to deal with trying to find a doctor who would approve it or listen to me. I didn’t want to have to put together a binder of information and drag it from office to office. I’m 37 years old and don’t need a random doctor or nurse telling me that I might change my mind or regret my decision.
So, how did I end up with a surgery date of January 3rd? It all started over the summer when I ended up with a horrible UTI. I mean, fucking horrible. I couldn’t sleep, I couldn’t 100% empty my bladder, a medication I was prescribed ended up causing migraines. I ended up going to the ER because I was exhausted and just couldn’t deal with it anymore. They didn’t really help that much. They were concerned about pain, which I wasn’t dealing with. I was tired and couldn’t piss properly. I was given the name of a urogynecologist when I was discharged and was told to make an appointment with him to make sure what I was dealing with was a UTI and not some other bladder issue. By the time I was able to see him, I no longer had the UTI but I wanted to keep the appointment to discuss it anyway and bring up possible sterilization. Guess what? He listened to me. He asked a few questions but that was it. Nothing about possibly changing my mind down the road, or anything of that sort. He just asked if I was sure, I said yes and then he went into details about the procedure and what I needed to do before hand to get it on the books. I had never left a doctor’s office that happy before! It’s scary enough to have to see a new doctor. Are they nice? What about bedside manner? Will they listen? What about the staff? But he was just, amazing. Everyone in the office was. I felt very relaxed around him. I didn’t feel judged for wanting the procedure or for having tattoos/piercings.
And that’s how I ended up having an actual surgery date scheduled! I still can’t believe how quickly it all happened but I’m relieved it did. I’ll be sure to write about the procedure and recovery in the new year.
I’m also not one for kids, and I’m totally all for hanging out and spoiling my friends kids as well, but I’ve just never felt super maternal or a need to have my own. Good luck with everything! I hope it goes well!
Thank you!